WHat's the damages?

Wanted to lay low, conserve money and Not so a big party this year for the kids so instead I did a bunch of little ones. Let's see the damge and see if it's worth it.

K
Bday brunch $60
Cake at gmas $35
Cake with friends $45

M
Lego store $150
Build a bear $50
House of air with buddie $45
Pizza for party at school $40
Home party with snacks and cake. $100

Nope not worth it. One big party for both and everone come.

Broken

I thought a few weeks ago. Hey why not have a small gathering of m loves school friends for some fun and cake. I sent a note to 6 classmates parents and included "drop off" ok. I didn't think that all the parents would drop their kid off at a practical strangers house. Boy was I wrong! 2 on the dot they all arrived within 10 minutes of each other and just a hello and see you later. Then at exactly 4:20 they started leaving until 4:30. They all had left. No problem, I thought this is easier than having the parents around except for having the proportion of alpha males be higher than 1. They were down right crazy pants. I tried to calm them and got called out on "you just want to have us stand here with our hands by our sides". Why yes, that would have been more preferrable but I let them have fun until crying or blood. I expected more blood. 2 girls played with the crafts and the boys beat the crap out of each other the entire time. I need a Valium and a massage.

Hello stranger

Life in the last four months have been nothing but intense. I was called for a few jobs and finally was talked into one and have been doing nothing but working since. Anywhere grim 65 to about 50 hours a week regularly and about 4 of those weeks was around 40. What a sham. I miss my kids but I only want to do a good job. I can't do it 1/2 way. But the family thing I definitely am. I didn't do a holidy card or calendar, didn't make it to more than one field trip, didn't make it to one celebration for either of their birthdays at school and see them about 2 times a week before they go to bed. Lord knows what they are doing with big B alone everyday. That's 3 boys with no discipline. All I know is when I come home M love jumps up and will say I didn't play wii today! And Kaden is staring into the set. When I was off there was no wii except a 1/2 hour on weekends and tv was not turned on in th daytime except for a 1/2 hour before bed to relax. There are bags of chips and some sweet artificial soda or Gatorade on the counter. Their activities all encompass things I never let them do on my watch. M love never has his reading log done on Wednesday and there is no checking of his homework. For some reason I could
work before and get things done. Now I can only work and trust that the kids are not going to die under their fathers care but not anything more is added to their development. I do it my way, he does it his. I trust I will get this balance thing one day it's just taking longer than I expected!