ramblings after the kids are asleep

i had a hard week this week. i feel like i have sabotaged my career by having kids. one was manageable but two makes me feel like i can not do anything well. i short change my kids, my husband and my job. no new news here. i have some soul searching to do on my next steps. how can i come back from maternity leave - have my job "eliminated" - placed in a temp position on a crazy team - acclimate to having 2 kids - help my family through a bankruptcy and 2 foreclosures - help remodel a new home in the last few months. i am starting to feel overwhelmed.